You’ve been bullet journaling for about a year now. Carrying the thing with you and pulling it out whenever you can. You’ve been getting down tasks and reminders. You even read the Bullet Journal Method book by Ryder Carroll. And after a year you are having thoughts like, This method is saving me. This method is keeping me sane. This method of getting notes down is keeping me mindful. That’s safe to say.
You have to admit though that the journaling method while keeping you mindful is mostly pointing out your flaws. You still owe emails and work to many friends and editors you know. You have many notes or bullets you continue to put off to the next entry and the next entry–this means you’ve been putting off some tasks and putting off some errands. For example, you haven’t emailed a few folks and you haven’t started your memoir file just yet. You seem to be afraid to start a memoir project. You don’t seem to understand why.
You’ve kept lists of documentaries you want to watch though you keep putting off watching them. Ken Burns’ Leonardo Da Vinci can help you in your Humanities 101 course but you keep putting it off. Burns’ Ernest Hemingway might help you with the memoir project problem. But again you keep putting off viewing the thing. You’ve journaled that the schedule of teaching and lecturing six times a week has you. That’s the excuse you reflect on. You have a listing of books to read and prepare to podcast on but you’ve put that off as well. In your notes you write, I wonder why? You don’t seem to have many answers. Mostly questions.
You have a listing of the year and all the birthdays of family and friends. You are prepared to remember though you notice there are a few you’ve missed.
The one repeated note you have in your notebook is on the task of writing. Continue to work on the Neighbor Lady project. That’s your latest. You feel it will be a collection of short stories and you have two stories drawn out that are nearly complete. You’ve written a couple of times under monthly reflection–why can’t I get going on this project? And you write: why can’t I get back to this project? Perhaps pointing out the flaws to yourself is the whole point. Perhaps that is what is saving you. Perhaps you will journal on this tomorrow.